Friday, February 4, 2011

Big Tent Poetry prompt: 2-4-11

"Aha! A Wordle! Pick any number of words (yes, from one to all) and write yourself a poem!"
    Seeking Refuge

The Chateau Laguiole
boring deeper into corky flesh
his single motivation
as he grinds the resistant blade
deeper into walnut,
Pawpaw’s handle rubbing blisters
on his leathered hands.
To breathe again
function unpretentiously,
he must set free the darkening fear
remote seclusion
growing with each passing day;
rotate, twist
down
down
down.
A Yankee candle dances vanilla
nothings float hypnotically,
hidden treasures locked within
the antique cabinet.
The basement door squeaks open
an acute angle of light
alerts the boy
of Granny’s approach;
horses trotting
down
down
down
the basement steps.
Granny calls the boy’s name.
He is a statue until the darkness returns.

22 comments:

gautami tripathy said...

Loved this. Great usage of words here...

tears of the sky fall to the ground

P-A-McGoldrick said...

Fun to play with!
So happy to find it that I often go back just to get a different perspective.
Patricia
PM_Poet Writer

flaubert said...

Nice tale here Laurie.
Words well used.
Pamela

vivinfrance said...

I'm not sure I understand this properly, Laurie. There was I expectingh a glass of a corsé
Bordeaux once the Laguiole corkscrew had done its work, but then the direction changed. Interesting.

lightverse said...

This was such an interesting poem, tacking in different directions at unexpected points. I loved how you wrote, "A Yankee candle dances vanilla..."

Mad Kane said...

Really well done. Very interesting use of those words.

Tumblewords: said...

Intriguing piece - it desires several reads and offers up a new pleasure each time.

nan said...

really great work! I enjoyed this very much.

Steve Finnell said...

you are invited to follow my blog

Robin said...

Laurie, this is intriguing. I love poems that tell a story. The down, down, down repetition is compelling. I didn't entirely understand what was happening until the last lines. I'll come back to read this again, for sure.

twitches said...

Nice ending!

Dick said...

Dark and dreamlike with all the invested words working hard!

irene said...

Wow, your setting to tell a story is superb Laurie!

Kelly said...

Your well-chosen words tell so much about the grandfather yet leave me wanting to know more about him. And the repetition of "down" is very effective. Feels like this could be developed into a short story or novel. Wonderful.

christopher said...

Yes...a story. I am just so impressed with the quality that has happened this week. The wordle has been magical that way.

LKHarris-Kolp said...

All~ Thank you so much for your kind words and comments!

~laurie

liv2write2day said...

Laurie, the imagery in this is exquisite. You just bring us right into the picture. Well done poem. Another thing I liked, there was nothing forced about your wordle use.

Joseph Harker said...

Cool story, and some of the little phrases you put in really added to the atmosphere: "corky flesh" and "vanilla nothings" and the "horses" on the steps. Very nice. :)

Deb said...

Rich and wholey unexpected narrative. Well done!

Judy Roney said...

You've built this wordle up to be very mysterious. Something is going on here and I want to know more. :) Great use of the words. Job well done!

barbara said...

Very clever, and nice use of the wordle-words. I especially like the stairstep sounds.

I'm having the same blog re-do urge. Shut my regular one down until I decide what needs doing, and started a sideblog.

kate fern said...

I really enjoyed your poem, I feel like it's about a child doing something he shouldn't. Lots of lovely images.