Saturday, December 10, 2011

Fort Me

~ba-boom, ba-boom, ba-boom~

It’s rapid fire, my heartbeat
sending rare pulsations to my fingertips
a grip I lose within this burning spasm
tumbling down the stairs a broken doll.

These shards of icy glass blowing
feel like prickly penetration poking
a downpour on my clammy skin

or bark from the sequoia rasped upon
defiled and released upon, this staunch enigma
spacious as it seems and weightless
yet confined within earthly walls reaching
to the sky, these elements I’ve built around Fort Me.

~ba-boom, ba-boom, ba-boom~

@laurie kolp

Prompt inspiration: The Sunday Whirl (rapid, glass, spacious, pulsations, weightless, elements, tumbling, grip, enigma, spasm, rare, released)

Also posted @ Imaginary Garden with Real Toads Open Link Monday 12-12-11

27 comments:

Eva Gallant said...

That was a challenge, and you met it head on!

The Unknowngnome said...

or bark from the sequoia rasped upon defiled and released upon, this staunch enigma ka-boom!

There is something in those lines I can't put my finger on or express but I know I like them.

I like the usage of "Fort Me". Have you noticed how close Fort Me is to Fort Laurie(Me) is to Fort Laramie? :)

Traci B said...

A very different take on the wordle from the other poems I've read so far, Laurie. I like it. We all have a tendency to build Fort Me, and we have to be careful not to let it become our prison.

Laurie Kolp said...

Thank you.

Daydreamertoo said...

Very good use of the prompt. Hard not to become hard-hearted when life keeps knocking us down isn't it. But, I suppose we have to be knocked down so that we learn how to get back up again. Fort Me, a good description.
Lovely wordle Laurie.

brenda w said...

Holy Cow, Laurie! This blew me away. Seriously great writing.
The connection of earthly elements and emotion is breathtaking.

flaubert said...

I echo Brenda here, Laurie, Holy Cow!
Great use of the words.

Pamela

S.E.Ingraham said...

wow Laurie - this is amazing - from your very excellent title which I think is inspired right on through to the end ... just fabulous!

irene said...

Wow, I'm impressed by this emotional shell. You're surprising, Laurie.

Susannah said...

I love this Laurie! It feels 'alive' and very potent.

I especially liked the starting and ending ~ba-boom, ba-boom, ba-boom~
- they worked so well.

Kerry O'Connor said...

Gosh! You have made amazing use of the words, Laurie.

Fireblossom said...

I love the broken doll tumbling down the stairs...or should I say, I loved the image...poor doll! But not as much as I loved the very imaginative notion of "Fort Me" under fire. So unique!

myheartslovesongs said...

brava, Laurie! very well done with the prompts and i also love "Fort Me." ♥

Abin Chakraborty said...

brilliant! wonderful poem.love the idea too.reminded me a bit of something I wrote a couple of years back.

Marian said...

yikes, be careful on those stairs!

Jinksy said...

I hope Fort Me doesn't repel borders... lol

Mary Mansfield said...

Don't know if I can top the praise already given, this poem was amazing!

mjshorts said...

A tremendous piece of writing Laurie.
Like others I thought the phrase 'Fort Me' was inspiring.

Titus said...

The use of the heartbeat was very effective, and the ending on Fort Me (particularly after the 'staunch enigma') really brought the poem to a unassailable full stop. Liked it.

cosmos cami said...

A great experience reading this.
I loved how you used the prompt words.
Enjoyed this a lot.

Margaret said...

"around Fort Me". Wow, I can't even imagine putting all these words together and you make it look easy.

zongrik said...

i built a fort around me and now it has to come down

kaykuala said...

How you managed to utilize the words so well! Yes, we take hard knocks in life. And we're all the richer by it!

Hank

Kay L. Davies said...

I didn't see it coming, despite the title...
"confined within earthly walls reaching
to the sky, these elements I’ve built around Fort Me"!
Wow, Laurie, "walls reaching to the sky, these elements I've built..."
Awesome.
K

Sherry Blue Sky said...

I love Fort Me. I once lived there too:) Great response to the wordle...difficult words!

Mary said...

At times, Laurie, i think we all need "Fort Me." Visiting from RT tonight, as I did not do the wordle this week.

jennifaye said...

Clever clever use of "Fort Me". Great work Laurie! :)