When the lights go out, I hope
you're not drunk. I hope
it's not night and you're not
living in a new apartment
in a new area that's not
safe because you ran
away from an ex, yet
wanted him to worry
about you. I hope
you don't go berserk
and call a coworker,
quibble back and forth
about why it's dark
in your apartment
and no one else's
because you're drunk.
I hope she doesn't
have to duplicate
her words ten times,
get frustrated and put
her friend-of-your-ex's
husband on the phone
to calm you down.
**
Prompt inspiration~
3WW: quibble, duplicate, berserk
30 comments:
Being drunk makes EVERYTHING harder.....especially when one is in the dark (literally and figuratively). Smiles.
poem's layout is interesting. well penned.
Oh! Perfect! When they need you they call, but such a moment! Why not instead of returning to what is gone, chose to live and let live?
a sad authentic piece
Laurie,
An intense piece of writing, which is sad, critical, but with a sense of caring holding it all together.
Very realistic situations, seen via your description.
Eileen
this is so wonderfully put caring yet with a hint of frustration that your friend is moving on.
her friend of your ex....well that would not be fun at all....oy, hoping not drunk too...yeah that kinda skews everything...nice rapid pace in this to accentuate the intesity...
...nothing/noone wins in such situation but the beer alone... ah, sadly.... intense write that is interestingly shaped... loved it... smiles...
Very hard to see a friend in such a situation,I feel the concern and sense of frustration. It's a hard place to be, watching someone self-destruct. All we can hope for is that they will overcome it. Nice write Laurie
It will be sad to see someone going through this...it can indeed be frustrating. I like the flow of this piece--hard hitting, heart rending and extremely well penned, Laurie.
I feel forlorn and lost after this, it made me feel that nothing is as it seems. Very well crafted and written.
This sounds very familiar to me, and am sure is very true to life to its author, too. Having lived around drinkers all my life, I can say without hesitation, you have totally nailed this!
I agree with Sherry, you nailed it!
I can truly imagine someone in this exact situation. Amazing how easily you have combined reality with these words.
It's sad that there're others who suffer this way. Worst, a friend in the dumps! Nicely Laurie!
Hank
Staggering around in the dark is no fun !! Your poem tells it like it is. Very nice ........
yikes- that would be awful
Sounds as though this is going to end in tears whatever. Hopefully that will be the first step forward to a new life when she realizes the tears are being wasted.
I think you must know this gal! I hope you aren't on the other end of that line!
Hope the person calms down. If drunk it will make things easier.
Sharp writing, Laurie. Sharp and sad.
Ya I hope so too
A nice story ... and so true often.
Oh dear! Powerful writing.
While I have never been drunk myself you have painted an incredibly vivid picture with your words. Impressive =)
Did I mention how much I love this? Even more on second read...smiles
Certainly a good list of hopes to have.
Sad one Laurie. Not only is it dark in said apartment but this is one of those worries that come to a person after the lights go out as well. Good prompt.
And I hope that we're never that drunk that we have to hope these hopes! Nicely done.
darkness ... and those who care worry even more.
Post a Comment