Many of you have asked about my cardinals, and the answer is YES~ I still see them all the time. In fact, I just looked out the window and spotted my beautiful red friend, sitting in the soft drizzle of rain coming down. My heart always skips a beat when I see a cardinal because the majestic crimson bird reminds me of God. And Mary. Funny that not minutes before I saw the cardinal today, I was going through some poems about Mary I had created a chapbook out of. This is no coincidence, and it not only happens to me, but to Jeni, Mary's sister, as well. Here is a list of just a few of the experiences I have had with cardinals:
1. Not long after Mary's death a cardinal skipped in front of my car at the church where we used to meet together. I had been sad and praying to God for a sign that Mary was okay. When I left, I saw the cardinal.
2. A cardinal chirped outside my window one morning after I had prayed to God and for some reason I knew to check on Ms. Angelle, who was bleeding to death and might not have made it had I not gone to visit her.
3. I gave Jeni a "Sisterhood" award for her blog. Soon after, my backyard was swarming with cardinals.
4. Jeni and I have spotted cardinals on numerous occasions as we were talking on the phone~ right in front of us.
5. I went on a retreat and got up to share about my pain since Mary's suicide, and everyone spotted a cardinal outside the window behind me as I spoke.
6. After praying on several occasions I have heard the beautiful song of the cardinal which led me outside to take a peek. A cardinal was always right there in front of me, no matter where I looked.
7. Last Monday was a VERY SPECIAL day for me and I saw a cardinal right outside my kitchen window as I poured myself some coffee that morning~ a sure reassurance that what I was about to do was good.
8. I saw a cardinal at the zoo last year just flitting around the path I was walking on; reaasurance that being there with Nicholas' class was a good thing (and something Mary would have done).
There are many more examples of how the cardinal has worked in my life, and I have written about them on this blog. The good news is that I view the cardinal as a positive, good thing. I have reached acceptance of what happened. Now I can look back with happy, fond memories and thank God for the time, although short, I had with my dear friend Mary.