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| Red Spot II, Wallisy Kandinsky |
This frozen field, my mind, plays tricks on me
it goes from chilled to hot in seconds flat
shocks thoughts electrifying to my feet
and on the earth a flame of anguish sparks.
All because of silly things, a misplaced shoe
or perhaps forgotten homework, dirty tracks
across the rug, those crazy dogs
(oh, I love them so).
Then all at once I feel serenity
it startles like an unexpected touch
a cloak of permeable karma flows through me
like magic all the heat is gone
I’m chilled again, born into God’s realm of joy.
@laurie kolp
Prompt inspiration:
*The Sunday Whirl (anguish, field, permeable, shocks, flame, fresh, startles, earth, born, feet, serenity, frozen)
Picture inspiration:
*The Mag
61 comments:
Laurie, what a lovely ending! I think your last stanza describes amazing grace as well as any could! I especially like the idea of a cloak of permeable karma.
Perfect:
Then all at once I feel serenity
it startles like an unexpected touch
a cloak of permeable karma flows through me
My late partners favourite expression was 'Take a chill pill' LOL
Lovely use of the wordle words Laurie.
Ah yes, one's mind CAN be a frozen field sometime indeed! Ending with a feeling of serenity - nice!
A grace-ful way to use the wordle words. Lovely.
The peace of the dream state is calming to the spirit.
rel
Beautifully done. You have brought clarity to chaos.
Beautifully!.....:)
Ahhh...lovely, Laurie. I feel the jump and spark at the beginning and calm with the speaker at the end. I'll bet most of us can identify with the moments you describe.
margo
Yes, agree the movement from electric shockedness to serenity and grace is lovely
What a journey - and excursion in extremes! You have such a deft touch in writing things like this. I am in awe.
(And btw...thanks so much for your kind comments on my wonderland road post.) ☼
nice contrast between heat and chill :)
"God's realm of joy." Is such a brilliant notion! (You mention dogs, and I went with cats!)
So very true, Laurie! You've captured this brilliantly. I loved: "A cloak of permeable karma flows through me." Gorgeous image!
Clever use of the random words, Laurie! It takes talent to have done so! Great verse!
Hank
I love how you end this with such a feeling of peace, Laurie. Nicely wordled.
Pamela
Love how this went from chaotic to peace..
A beautiful interpretation.
I think weaving the words together shows us how to create something out of life's messiness.So here's to seeing beyond it and walking right into hope.
PS As I just posted my wordle I was thinking I was an early bird...with the number of responses here I can see that is not so!
Hi Laurie,
You write of the back and forth feelings of consciousness with grace and clarity. I wish you more of the serenity, less of the electrifying (though a little is probably good and necessary).
Always look for the joy amid the chaos. A good read.
I do like the serene closing, born into God's realm of joy ~
Lovely write ~
beautiful....
lovely story.
I must agree with everyone... Beautiful and lovely!..
JJRod'z
lovely finish
Lovely poem. Really like the lines:
"Then all at once I feel serenity
it startles like an unexpected touch
a cloak of permeable karma flows through me
like magic all the heat is gone
I’m chilled again, born into God’s realm of joy."
Interesting pic too, Laurie.
I like the higgledy pigledy feel.
"All because of silly things" is so true. It kind of described *the mood recently.*
"...those crazy dogs / (oh, I love them so).
I'm right there with you, Laurie. This is a fantastic read. Brava!
How wonderful, Laurie. Life's like that, isn't it?
K
That's a cool take on this Magpie. Nice!
This is so beautiful. So comforting.
Thanks for stopping by.
Laurie this poem is beautiful...we are often too quick to make a big deal over the small stuff. It's great when we recognize it and catch ourselves.
serenity finds me and i startle at its touch...smiles...what a lovely place to be...int eh midst of the daily chaos...nice laurie...
"an unexpected touch," this is a very captivting piece. Well written!
-Erick F.
This frozen field, my mind, plays tricks on me
I know the feeling well! LOL
Beautifully told!
Anna :o]
Thanks! I find God's touch- when I am lucky enough- can send shivers; tends to be on the warm side
for me :)
Love the last line,"I’m chilled again, born into God’s realm of joy. "
Amazing, I can see all those things. Everyone of them. Obvious. Unmissable. But I didn't see them until I read your poem. Beautiful and clever.
Life can get busy, Laurie. This illustrates, perfectly, the storm before the calm.
So true...our minds can take us from chilled to hot and bothered in no time flat! So enjoyed this, Laurie.
Electricity in the feet..love that idea..you need to sit down to earth the current..I felt like a big sigh at the end..after chaos comes calm..hopefully..electrifying write..Jae
i like how serenity startles
iron masked fighter
nope no problems...5 x 5
Nicely done Laurie...especially the ending...a cloak of permeable karma flow through me...yup, love that karma to flow in AND out!
Roger ☺
Thanks for bringing hope out of the chaos.
=)
This one is very beautiful. Love it.
Wish I could get rid of the heat as quickly. I tend to stew...and stew...and stew...
Flat out wonderful...
sooooo lovely, Laurie! i never would have guessed you were working from prompts.
dani ♥
An inventive interpretation of the prompt.
Thank you, by the way, for inviting me to participate in the A River of Stones challenge. It was a fun month.
Permeable karma, the very best kind...
Neat work. I came looking at the painting and totally missed the wordle, it was so well integrated. I do like your take on the painting.
Laurie, I like the play of hot and cold. I really like "a flame of anguish sparks". I wasn't sure if it was a "flame of anguish" sparking or if it was "anguish sparks" in the flames.
Richard
LOL, don't try read this poem while listening to the Who.
But the poem won that battle and that says a lot about the poem
Very well constructed work. Thanks for sharing
Lovely Laurie, especially the dog!
Karma can be both an ugly and a beautiful thing...this is a lovely poem for the prompt Laurie....it will also work for the Poetry Jam prompt this week to. :-)
Excellent! I just found your poetry through the wordle site (new for me) and like it A LOT.
Oh, I can relate! The mind is so often a frozen field. Isn't it wonderful that karma can be permeable? Thank you for this.
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