With hair like straw of wheat thatched upon a roof
and eyes as gray as stones beneath the earth
the man appeared in lightning’s fluttering flash
at the wooden gate where I stood, for what
forgotten on this night of blackened mist.
I watched his weathered hands grope the fencepost
with troubled breathing and bubbling spit
thousands of reasons rushed through my mind
on why I should turn and bolt
but
I
stayed.
The blind man with a raspy voice
asked if he could come inside awhile
sit and warm up at my cozy hearth
a fact I wondered how he knew, too late
I realized as my head bounced on rooted
ground, a dormant fear I had I felt rebuild
and I knew he was back
to
finish
me… sigh.
@laurie kolp
The Sunday Whirl (thatched, hearth, fluttering, breathing, flash, gate, stones, grope, rebuild, thousands, bubbling, forgotten)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
aros, Day 7
Fog is a heavy cloak
of consternation
blinding
all perception
polluting
sanity
until
the son's light
lifts it.
17 comments:
Very frightening ending, Laurie! Chills me to the bone.
Here's mine:
http://inthecornerofmyeye.blogspot.com/2012/01/two-wordles-from-same-words.html
I was putting money on him being from the tax office.
Brilliant building of suspense...
oooh....that is foreboding!
Oh wow... that was a sad ending. The stuff of horror.
Well written Laurie~!
I Like the character sketch. You build a vivid scene through both your description and the actions.
margo
Loved your description of the old man. "Eyes gray as stones beneath the earth" was very cool. Had me in suspense!
A dark tale? Or a playful dream?
A frisson of fear ripples up and down my spine! Delightful (although somewhat gruesome) read!
love the spin at the end, great story
Suspenseful write, Laurie. Well done.
Pamela
Scary.
Thought you were going with one of those "angels unawares" stories, Laurie. More like a serial killer incognito... *shivers*
I like both poems, and I'm glad you included the second one to end the post on a positive note. :)
I wonder why the speaker stayed, that's incongruent, as well as her wistful tone, almost like she wanted it.
Dark and scary...I loved it!
I could see the movie as I read. Excellent story telling! Quite a creepy story.
stunning, Laurie! i would never have been able to spot the prompt words ~ a very well-woven tale.
Loved it!
♥
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