The Keys Hold the Key
Lynn’s metronome ticks an erratic beat
Back and forth, then – (gasp)
Echoing crescendos fill the air,
I wonder how it came to this.
Whiffs of bleach tease the musty room
My stinging eyes rebel against the smell,
Could these tears reflect morbidity?
A quick span, my head skirts the obvious
Back and forth, then – (gasp), then Oh, my God!
Luminous rays paint golden stripes
Across her upright hogging space
Like a sunny jailbird on the loose.
The drop of red painting middle C
A haunting omen of that fateful day.
@laurie kolp
14 comments:
There is a great deal of tension..a crescendo and fall..in this piece..almost frantic and at times a little worrying..the 'sting of bleach' was just that..does my memory serve me right that you wrote another piece around the 'middle c'..it's a wonderful device..Jae (I guess it wasn't a sunburnt penguin then!)
Tight and taut. An excellent read.
love the movement and the rhythm you capture...lovely.
wonderful!
a very rhythmic write
you really build up the tension in this piece.Wonderfully written poem
Very tense indeed - is this a sick-bed scene, it felt like it.
Everything is tied together SO well in this poem, Laurie!
You kept my rapt attention throughout, emotional and suspenseful. I'm a little confused about what actually happened, though. Sorry.
Thanks so much for commenting everyone.
gsb3- What happened is anyone's interpretation...oh, and there is a lot of music/ piano lingo.
Tension is in the words. But it tells a wonderful story. Thank you so much for this beautiful piece. My 3WW: http://verseinanutshell.wordpress.com/2011/06/02/dare/
Phew, I bet this was a murder!
Amazingly recorded!!
Sounds like an interrogation I love this poem its intense and intriguing I'd love to see a story
Why that's a wonderful idea. Thanks!
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