Friday, May 18, 2012

Bad Neighborhoods

You were forewarned
not to go, not to go, not to go
into that neighborhood
but you did anyway.

Did you hear the beggar
on the street corner
calling out to you,
“I ain’t got nothin’
no new clothes
my shoes have holes
and my rat’s nest of a house,
it’s too small for my family.
Help me, help.”

Help me
Help me

Or did the whiskey woman by the bar,
strutting her stuff with confidence,
catch your eye when she bragged
about being 40 and better than you?

Better than you
Better than you

What about the peddlers in the park?
Did they tell you you’re not good enough,
that your art sucks, go away?

Go away
Go away

I told you not to go there
that neighborhood’s dangerous.
Why don’t you come to the beach
and relax with me?

©laurie kolp

Prompt inspiration:
IGWRT- Mary's Mixed Bag

18 comments:

Shawna said...

What a great opening. Isn't that always the way---one voice warning, one voice ignor(e)-ance? And then there are all those voices in the bad neighborhoods telling us how worthless we are. I love your ending...let's just run away to the beach. :)

Mary said...

Whether to take heed if the voices that inform one of the other side of the coin is the question! (I personally would steer clear of perceived dangers.)

Hannah said...

Oh, Laurie the echoing element of your poem is haunting and effective! I enjoyed this!

Brian Miller said...

ha i would probably be hanging out in the neighborhood a bit...i dont mind the gritty places...the beach sounds nice though...

Daydreamertoo said...

Oh that little battle between common sense and ignoring it.
Nice inner battle described here Laurie.

Mary Mansfield said...

I'd probably be hanging out in the neighborhood as well...very nicely done Laurie!

Buddah Moskowitz said...

No contest - let's go to the beach where a different variety of bums and lowlifes preside.

Eva Gallant said...

There's something eerie about it; I like the turn around at the end..lets go to the beach!

Sherry Blue Sky said...

I'm with you, Laurie...let's go to the beach and forget all about it!!!!!

Kay L. Davies said...

Good stuff, Laurie, an excellent write. But let's all get together and go to the beach!
K

Teresa said...

If only we could listen to that little voice.

Kerry O'Connor said...

This is a very intriguing poem - one which seems to have an untold story behind it.

Dave King said...

A cautionary tale that in the end is not a cautionary tale. I like the way the outcome is withheld. We don't know whether he/she was wise to ignore the warning or not.

The repetition works well, I thought.

Vince Gotera said...

Laurie, I thought this poem was going to have a horrible ending. Though I guess the ending just doesn't say what happened to the "you."

My favorite part is the echoing of the taunts. Those are warnings as well, and they resonate. Try to get our attention, like all warnings, especially when they are ignored.

Good work.

Vince Gotera said...

Oh, by the way, I just added you to my blogroll ... a little late but done. ;-D

Mystic_Mom said...

Is there a part two? :-) I want to know the rest of the story, this just aches with it! Love it though...very good.

Judy Roney said...

Well, this sure leaves me worrying about..something. We often do not listen to the warnings we get or hear in our own heads.

Ella said...

Clever! I have been down that road and it has a lot of detours that entrap one's soul! Yes, the beach is so much better ;D
Well Done~