a waltz across the sea, it seems
the sailboat rocks methodically
oNe, TwO, tHrEe, OnE, tWo, ThReE
she lies topless catching rays,
his pole is cast throughout the day
oNe, TwO, tHrEe, OnE, tWo, ThReE
at night after their catch is won
a floating bed, it seems finespun
oNe, TwO, tHrEe, OnE, tWo, ThReE
**
Prompt Inspiration:
Poetry Jam~ The Sea
PU Mid-Week~ Melody
26 comments:
Oh, how romantic...I feel the floating bed after the whole day spending on the sailboat...nice :)
steamy Hot! :) and really sings... maybe you should add some music to it! :)
I love the rhythm in this poem! Nothing like being lulled to sleep by the waves.
What a song! It is different than what I see/hear by the sea, mine is more classicalragingthat damnce music, but I sure like this melody and its harmonies.
The dance of the wealthy yacht owners I guess.
Oh, indeed the sea sometimes seems to dance. You have shown well the rhythm of its dance, Laurie.
I like the rhythm
Well done.
Lovely description Laurie--though I even started feeling a little sea sick with the rocking! (My sea sick experience is a fairly recent one so it comes easily to mind)
I love the waltz and now I'll be thinking of that beat whenever I get the chance to rock with the sea. Simple, yet brilliant--like most of your poems ☺
Suggestive and funny too. I wasn't sure whether she was catching rays of sunshine or rays the fish but the picture was getting blurred and steamy at that point!
'And when she sang, the sea,
Whatever self it had, became the self
That was her song, for she was the maker.'beautiful song -has a touch of Wallace Stevens-
'she dances and becomes the dance herself'revolving in a trance'
I felt the rocking of the waves as I read. Well done!
Interesting and steamy, this creates quite a picture.
Nice days like this do have a lovely rhythm.
oh this is nice- rhythmic, the repetition is charming
much love...
No wonder they only taught us country dancing at school...waltzing sounds much more fun
This is so charming and free: a waltz across the sea - what could be more rollicking.
Ah yes to sleep on a boat again would be fun.
Beautifully done, Laurie! I was especially caught by the word "finespun." Perfection.
a delightful waltz with the sea playing the melody and the others in perfect harmony.
loved this melody a lot..
magical rhythm!!..swaying by the melodious waltzing waves...so dreamy...
Wonderful visual effect in this, the way those letters echo the rhyme, the rhythm of the waves. I like the sly humor of the 2nd stanza too. Good write!
repetition of one,two,three giving it a magical effect
See The Sea
This begs a melody to become a song, Laurie. Lovely write!
lovely....nice...
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