Big Tent Poetry: List poem

Forever Young--Naturally, or not?

by Laurie Kolp

Good Morning!
Hurry up…
Anti-puff eye roller
Cucumber, teabags, witch hazel (Oh, my)
Advanced Revita Lift-- night and day
Oatmeal, honey, lemon, yogurt (Key Lime pie?)
Wrinkle De-Crease Collagen Filler
Egg whites and coconut oil (Virgin)
Sunscreen, SPF- (infinity)
Hats-- baseball, straw, Panama, Stetson (Howdy Pardner!)
Surgery-- tummy tuck, Gastro-bypass, boob job?
Exercise, water, fruits and vegetables (Hoot, Hoot)
Loreal hair color to hide the gray
Oils-- mustard seed, jojoba, castor, ginger, sesame
Pony tails, scarves and Donald Trump (not) comb overs, too
Rapunzel’s golden hair? (Tangled remedy, of course)
Clean living, acceptance, attitude (Amen)
Slow down…
Good Night!


Big Tent Poetry's prompt this week was to write a list poem.  I hope you enjoyed mine.  Thanks for visiting... please come again.  Oh, and I would love to have you follow me.  ~Laurie

Happy New Year!   

Poetic Asides' Wednesday prompt: Last Chance

Who Wants to be a Vegetable?

by Laurie Kolp

Flip a coin, heads or tails?

Roll five matching die.

Fan a flush or full house.

Throw a Leaning Jowler in the sty.

But never take a chance on life--

Things may go either way.

Over-cooked vegetables are soggy,

Except in Russian Roulette.

Recap of Christmas Day

5:30 a.m.- My eyes fly open and I am ready to go.  I hear Katie, Andrew and Nicholas chatting in the boy's room.  They know they have to wait there until either 6:00, or until we come and get them.  I wake Pete up without a problem (sometimes he can be hard to awaken).  We get the coffee going and try to prepare for the upcoming chaos. 

5:55 a.m.- Pete and I find the kids all piled in Andrew's twin bed waiting patiently and whispering sweet nothings (a gift in and of itself).  Before we rush out to see what Santa brought, we say Happy Birthday to Jesus and wish everyone Merry Christmas.

6:30 a.m.- The presents are all opened and appreciated, the living room is a mess and I am in the kitchen sneaking Christmas cookies with my second cup of coffee.  Pete lights a fire in the fireplace on this beautiful cold morning.

8:30 a.m.- Breakfast has been cooked and eaten, Katie is snuggled on the couch reading a new book, and Andrew checks out the new X-box Kinect while Nicholas and Pete complete a racecar Lego model.  Freshly ground Starbucks is brewing and all is peaceful on the home front.

10:00 a.m.- One of the two ping-pong balls from the new tabletop ping pong set has been smashed, the remote control helicopter has broken (luckily Pete was able to fix it) and tears have been shed after a dart gun Nerf bullet landed in a cheek from an arm's length distance.  Sigh... more chocolate.

11:00 a.m.- We are like a classroom full of ADHD kids bouncing from one activity to the other- trying to find out how the Kindle works, playing, reading, chewing gum from Santa (spitting it out and then trying different flavors), making messes with new board games and tiptoeing through open spaces while the dogs wonder around aimlessly, confused by all the fuss.

11:30 a.m.- I suddenly remember I need to cook an asparagus dish by 12:30.  Quick reference to allrecipes.com because I do not feel like going all elaborate with what I had intended to make.  I find an interesting idea, make my own adjustments and add my personal touches.  Luckily, it turned out great!

12:30 p.m.- It is time to go to my sister's house for Christmas dinner.  I quickly ice the birthday cake for Jesus Katie and I baked on Christmas Eve, gather the rolls and asparagus, while Pete corrals the kids together.

 1:00 p.m.- We are happily sharing Christmas cheer with everyone.  The turkey needs to cook longer, so we visit, play the piano and goof off taking pictures.  The kids play basketball outside with their grown cousins whom they do not get to see very often anymore, and are so well-behaved while they wait to eat.

2:30- Everyone joins in prayer and feasts on the delicious turkey dinner.  Conversation is flowing and everyone is getting along.  It is truly a wonderful experience.

4:30- We are back home watching Despicable Me (a Christmas present).  Everyone is tired and full.  We kiss under the mistletoe, love on each other and settle in for the evening.

8:30- The kids are getting ready for bed.  We count our blessings and review the day.  When asked what their favorite part of the day was, it was unanimous- playing basketball with their cousins.  PRICELESS!

Wrapping paper or gift bags?

Yes, you can call me old-fashioned; I still like to wrap presents.  I love the beautiful paper and find the mindless chore of cutting, folding and taping quite calming.  I can swish all my problems and worries under the bed while I wrap gifts.  My creative juices flow as I decorate the presents with curled ribbon and fancy bows.  Christmas, birthday, anniversary, or whatever the occasion, you will probably get a wrapped gift from moi.  Of course, I always throw in a few gift bags to spice things up; but for the most part, I rap, er, wrap.

Sometimes when the kids attend a party, our present stands alone as the only one not bagged, kind of like the unique individuals we want them to become.  In ten years, kids will probably look at wrapping paper and say, "What's that?"  You know, like records and cassette tapes; things of the past. 

Yesterday Pete and the boys ventured out to Hobby Lobby (they were working on their Pinewood Derby cars).  Of course, the lines were very long as last-minute shoppers rushed around in a needless frenzy.  While they waited, the boys noticed a lady in front of them with dozens of gift bags in varying sizes.  A conversation began and the lady confessed that because she had left all her wrapping to the last minute, she was going to use gift bags instead of paper.

"I hate doing that," she said, "but sometimes life is just too busy."

So my question to YOU is: Do you prefer wrapping presents or gift bagging them?

My wish for YOU is to find the power to S-L-O-W down and enjoy the moment, the beauty of the season.  Gift bag or paper, it is what's on the inside that counts anyway.  Merry Christmas!

Big Tent Poetry Prompt: Wordle

Christmas Tree Wreckage

by Laurie Kolp

Movement failed Mignon as she watched

the fourteen-foot Christmas tree

topple from vaulted ceiling

to marble tiled floor

like a trapeze artist

in a poor performance.

A decoupage of broken lamps

and shattered glass,

cracked branches and pine needles

immersed in rubbles of red, green and gold

smashed presents and broken ornaments

filled the majestic room

mere hours before

the guests were to arrive.

The North Pole Christmas train

continued its circuitous route

through the wreckage

belting Christmas carols

and chiming bells

as the engine’s slight headlight

shone brightly in the dark.

“I’m going to squeeze the life out of you!”

Jim heard the hoarse words

vanish into smoky air,

and like a disloyal soldier

swift ropes fail to capture,

he played possum

in the basement of his mind.
*

Big Tent Poetry's weekly prompt was a wordle- Use as many of these words in a poem: swift, immerse, topple, disloyal, squeeze, hoarse, vanish, ropes, slight, engine, basement, performance.  I can proudly say I was able to use all of them.

PA prompt- December 22

Poetic Asides' Wednesday prompt is to write a poem about something or someone dreadful.

The Twelve Dreadful Things of Christmas

by Laurie Kolp

Dispersed animosity at family gatherings,

whispers and gossip overheard in the hall,

distasteful presents regifted each Christmas,

the same colored sweater two sizes too small,

store-bought food in homemade disguises,

green bean casserole and fruitcake (gag me!),

Aunt Ida’s drunk antics, slurred innuendos,

runny noses and coughs airborne for free,

feeling as stuffed as Tom Turkey at noon,

sugar highs like seesaws unsteady and weak,

hills that tumble when stomachs rumble,

flabby thighs that jiggle and squeak.

Prompt: Favorite words

Blessings

by Laurie Kolp

Love is blood

flowing within,

the powerhouse of life

we need to begin.

Acceptance

the essence

of a mind serene,

antibodies we need

to keep our lives clean.

Forgiveness

the core

that beats throughout

a heart content

bold and stout.

Without these virtues

life turns limp and stale,

so love, accept, forgive

and blessings will trail.

Shepherd girl in a hectic world

When Katie was in preschool, she played the innkeeper's wife in the Christmas play.  She was so precious.  I remember how she spoke her one line so loud and clear.  The teachers said nobody had ever spoken so concise and with such confidence.  The other participants were well-behaved and all agog in wide-eyed excitement, too.  It was a positive experience for both young and old.

Fast forward seven years.

Katie had another opportunity to participate in a Christmas tradition- our church's live nativity scene.  This time she was a shepherd girl.  The junior-high experience was quite a contrast to the preschool play.  One kid told her mom she hated her in front of everyone, while another stood against the wall pouting after what had obviously been a mom/daughter spat before their late arrival.

The 6th, 7th and 8th graders had to pose for an hour outside the church.  Katie and another shepherd girl remained quiet as told, but talking, gum chewing, baby Jesus passing, giggles and who-knows-what-else could be observed by this keen parent (and others, too).  Here are some comments I heard from attendants:

"I have never seen such unhappy faces up there."

"I don't think they made gum back then."

"Is this it?"

Well ~duh~ with prepubescent teens, YES!  Unfortunately, they are not in preschool anymore. 

Considering only a handful of volunteers showed up and some of the kids were not too thrilled to be there, I think they did pretty well.  I commend them for taking time out of their busy schedules to sit still and share the joy of Jesus' birth.  After all, without Him, there would be no Christmas.

Seasons Greetings 2010

by Laurie Kolp

Life is like a merry-go-round at the zoo

A year in review can be like that, too

Sometimes it spins fast, sometimes slow

So step right on and watch the Kolps go

Pete flew through the year working real hard

New projects he started for the shipyard

I freelanced and authored a bevy of work

Published a bit, typed like a clerk

School always comes first, the kids do well

Swirling with honors at June’s final bell

Katie danced, sung and acted in New York for a while

Then jumped to middle school with a smile

Andrew karate-chopped his way to green belt

Camped with the scouts, grew big and svelte

Nicholas flattered every person he met

Placed on the swim team, all summer stayed wet

We turned around and it was Christmas again

The year had been fun and a memorable spin

MERRY CHRISTMAS

&

Happy New Year

Addendum to "What makes my kids unique: Nicholas"

Yesterday, Pete went to get Nicholas from his class after Andrew's Christmas party.  A cute little girl runs up to Pete and excitedly taps him on the arm.

"Hey Nicholas' dad, is it true Nicholas becomes a werewolf at night?"  She asked with big, curious eyes.

To which Nicholas' dad answered, "Sometimes."

The girl walked slowly back to her desk.

That's just like Nicholas.

Quirky morning banter

Conversation at breakfast this morning:

Nicholas asked, "How long does it take to get through college?"

"It depends on what your major is," said Andrew.

"Usually around four years if you go full-time, but if you have to work sometimes it takes longer," I said.  I was not about to bring up the fact that college can take longer if you are having too much fun.

"Well, I want to go so I can get the best job in the world."

"What would that be?" Katie asked.

"Working at McDonald's," Nicholas answered proudly.

"Oh my gosh, Nicholas!  That's not the best job," Andrew corrected.

At the same time, Katie said, "Nicholas, you don't have to go to college to work at McDonald's."

Nicholas defended himself, "But I could get all the happy meals and toys I want, AND free french fries whenever I want!"

Not in California, I thought.

"Maybe you can work there during high school.  It could be your very first job," I said with a smile.

The conversation was like a little commercial; quick and to the point.  Then it was time to get ready for the last day of school before the Christmas holidays. 

**********

Pete had gone to work before we woke up this morning, so I took the kids to school.  On the way, I called my mom to say 'Good Morning' because we usually talk around eight.  My dad has been feeling bad, so I asked her how he was doing.  Then I asked my mom if he was playing golf today.  (My dad usually plays golf four or five times a week now that he is retired.  When he is not playing golf, he is practicing at the driving range).  Mom said he was not playing today, which meant he REALLY felt like crud. 

When I got off the phone, Nicholas was the first one to speak.

"Is Papa playing golf today?"

"Not today," I answered.

"That's weird," said Katie.

 "Yeah, because he is always playing golf," Nicholas said.

"Well, he's not feeling up to PAR right now," I said, oblivious to the pun; but my sharp kids picked up on it.  They burst out in laughter.

"Up to PAR... that's clever, Mom," Andrew pointed out.

I decided to keep it a secret that what I said was unintentional and smiled.

I am so ready to have my children home with me for two weeks!

Prompt: Birds

The Beauty of Christmas Eve

by Laurie Kolp

Pitter-pat, pitter-pat

The rush of prancing steps

Resounds through the house

As giddy children dressed for bed

Prepare for Santa Claus  

A splay of homemade sugar cookies

Mouth-watering sand tarts

Placed lovingly before the fireplace

Outside, snow-covered evergreens

Decorate winter’s mural

Wet pine aroma amid burning cedar

Drifts through the frigid night air

Red splashes in white

A male and female cardinal

Sit majestically and wait

Their heads turned, eyes fixed

Upon the beauty of Christmas Eve

What makes my kids unique: Nicholas

The thing about Nicholas is that he's just that- Nicholas; and there is no one else like him.  He answers to many names (Nickel, Nicholas, Pickle, Pickolas, Nicholas-Pickolas, Nick), but he will always be my baby Nicholas.  And just like Katie and Andrew, Nicholas has many unique and creative characteristics.

Ever since he began talking, Nicholas has told us elaborate stories that flow from his technicolor imagination like the river Nile.  He had such a love for tractors and bulldozers when he was three and four that we would have to explore construction sites whenever possible.  Even then he would tell me stories about trucks and ships doing this or that. 

Many are the times he has had the whole family in stitches.  That's Nicholas.

Whenever we see movies, Nicholas takes on the persona of the most awe-inspiring character.  For instance, when we saw the movie Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thieves, he became the satyr, Grover.   For weeks, he hobbled around the house mimicking Pierce Brosnan.  Nicholas shared his "secret" with only me (that he was Grover).   He told me detailed stories about what really happened at night when he was supposed to be sleeping.  He became Grover and did things a satyr would do, whatever that could be (I'm sure Nicholas had that covered).

After watching The Sorcerer's Apprentice recently, Nicholas shared another secret with me; he is really Balthazar- the apprentice who studied under Merlin.  Apparently at night, he weaves his magic spells and duels evil sorcerers just like Nicholas Cage does in the movie.  ~Sigh~ I must say that things are never boring around our house.

Many are the times he has had the whole family in stitches. That's Nicholas.

Not only is he very creative, but he is sensitive, thoughtful and caring.  Nicholas is always genuinely concerned about other people's feelings and well-being.  He is very intuitive and clever, and he will always be my baby.  I love you, Nickel!

Snow

by Laurie Kolp

Sugar-coated

Nibbles

On Christmas

Whet my appetite

Big Tent Prompt

Big Tent Poetry invited participants to write a poem inspired by Referential Magazine's published pieces.  Redemption came to me after reading The angel on my shoulder is mute as stone and nowhere near as heavy in Scott Owens' 13 Ways to Angels. My poem is based on a real life experience I had when a stalker tried to attack me and I locked myself in a closet on the porch of my apartment, but the meaning can be interpreted in many ways.  Hope you enjoy! 

Redemption

by Laurie Kolp

I sit on a red toolbox  

alone in the dark,

blocked from the devil  

waiting on the other side.  

My heart is a hammer

thump, thumping

in my head.

I close my eyes

and start to pray.

Suddenly I stand up.

The angel on my shoulder
is mute as stone and nowhere
near as heavy

but it gives me courage

to face the ugly beast.

I carry the hammer in my hand

and walk out of the dank closet

prepared to face my enemy,

but all I see is light.

*Scott Owens’ 13 Ways of Angels
"Referential Magazine" 

Kissy, kissy mistletoe

Mommy hung some mistletoe
In the doorway Christmas Eve
Someone said it was for kissing
To that I said, “Gag Me!”
Laughter filled the merry room
Everyone thought I was funny
To that I said, “Bah Humbug!”
Only to increase their revelry
Especially when Mommy kissed me


@laurie kolp


Open Link Monday- Imaginary Garden with Real Toads

What makes my kids unique: Andrew

I remember the wonderment that filled my curious mind when I found out I was pregnant with Andrew.  Would he have a full head of jet black hair like Katie did when she was born?  Would he act the same way?  Who would he look like, Pete or me?  I have learned that trying to compare my children to one another is like trying to find the similarities between eggnog and apple cider; it is virtually impossible.  Yes, they are both drinks associated with the holidays, but they have differing tastes and consistencies.  Likewise, my children have the same parents, but they are each unique and special.  Let me share with you what makes my dear, sweet Andrew (or Drew, as he likes to be called) one of a kind.

Drew at belt testing 12-4-10

Drew is a perfect middle child.  He goes with the flow and tries not to rock the boat.  When Katie and Nicholas are arguing over something like whose turn it is to sit in the front, Drew remains neutral and would even give up his turn for a little peace.  I know that he would follow the rules even when alone.  He is just like that.

Drew is also very competitive and extremely smart (in fact he is a genius).  He wants to be the best and is very hard on himself.  I can remember when Katie was in kindergarten and Drew was only three.  Katie would bring home little books for reading.  Drew would look over her shoulder and listen as we went over them.  He learned to read that way-- at the age of three, I kid you not.  When we would go have lunch with Katie and run into the principal, I would tell her what he was reading (Sherlock Holmes or something like that).  The principal would ask him to tell her about it, and he would summarize the book as if he were writing a review for Amazon.  He was reading Harry Potter books in kindergarten and first grade, and has read the entire series at least two times!  He had to go to upper level grades for reading because he was so bored.  Drew's birthday is August 29, so we could have waited a year to put him in kindergarten.  He is only three days shy of the cut-off date.  But we knew he was way too smart to do that, and even though he is one of the youngest (a girl shares his birthday), Drew is still one of the smartest in fourth grade.

Being intelligent and competitive is not always a good thing, though.  They say "Wednesday's child is full of woe," and that is true to some extent; especially when Drew views himself as a failure at something.  He plays sports but gets too upset when his team loses or if strikes out and doesn't score.  We have enrolled him in Taekwondo and that has helped boost his self-esteem tremendously.  He just made Green Belt, Level 2.  I am so proud of my precious Drew; I dearly love him, too.

Prompt: Containers / Warning: PG-13

The Christmas Eve Frenzy

by Laurie Kolp

Children can hardly contain themselves

when Christmas Eve finally arrives;

Santa Claus is coming to town, you know.

Parents wait patiently  

for the children to sleep

a battle the little ones fight,

until heavy eyelids finally give in

to visions of sugarplums and such.

At last the house is quiet

not even a mouse stirs;

the jingle bell rock can begin.

Mom dives into the closet

pulls out hidden containers

filled with glad tidings

ready to be dispersed

under Oh, Christmas tree’s lovely branches,

Dad decks the halls with tools

lifts containers and rearranges

those “assembly required” presents;

both franticly rushing to get the job done

pausing for a kiss underneath the mistletoe

before their short winter’s nap

and then awakened in the wee hours of morn

to excited children shouting “Merry Christmas,”

as their contained parents struggle  

to find joy in the world

after three hours sleep.

Colors of the Season

Blue Christmas

by Laurie Kolp

Splashes of red and green

accent the world around me,

but all I see is a cast of blue--

lackluster navy, cobalt,

midnight, indigo and ice;

swirling dervishes

in my psyche

that like a starving animal

furiously rips away all hope

and ruthlessly injects sharp teeth

awestruck innocence shrinks in fear

thrashing its head violently

as greed plants its bitter seed

side to side voraciously

devouring the season’s joy

and leaving Christmas

colorless again.   

Another holiday poem

ODE TO SWEETS

by Laurie Kolp

Oh,

how

I love

you sweet

holiday food

with your sugar

cookies shaped into

bells and Santa Claus,

reindeer, Christmas trees,

homemade powder-sugared icing

dyed red and green, a long afternoon

of sheer delight you bring; and creamy rich

fudge that melts in my watering mouth each time

I bite into your irresistible flesh, you leave me

always begging and craving more, more, more unwanted

poundage begins in my hips I feel them expanding

with each passing day. Oh, sweet holiday food because of your tempting delight my seat has more padding, no more cushions do I need as I

sit and eat.

What makes my kids unique: Katie

For the next three posts, I am going to share with you some of the MANY things I love about my children.  They are each so unique and special that sometimes it is hard to believe that they came from the same mold.  Every child is his own person, with his own soul.  Katie, Andrew and Nicholas may have some of the same physical features and learned behaviors from Pete and me, but they are each their own person.  I will give you examples of this, beginning with my oldest and only daughter, Katie.



Katie

Now that she is in middle school, we have gotten her a cell phone.  I hated doing this right now because I knew it would open up a brand new can of worms; but there were times after school that a phone would have come in handy.   We had an out-dated cell phone of Pete's with his old phone number that we used to let her borrow for sleep-overs.  Katie also brought it with her when she went to New York City last summer.  She was always embarrassed when she had that phone; and I must admit, it was UGLY.  Since we were combining accounts and switching to a family plan, we got some great deals on new phones, and VOILA- she got one.  Katie doesn't have Internet access, but she does have a 24-7 lifeline to her BFFs-- with her dad's old number.  I must say, it has been quite amusing at times because some people Pete hasn't talked to in a long time have tried to reach him.  How Katie has responded to this is one of the many things I love about her.  

First Katie kept getting calls from someone whose number she didn't recognize (it was the cub scout master, by the way).  She ignored it until she finally got a text.  It said something like,

"Have you registered the boys for next weekend yet?"

Well, a tween's mind can take that message and twist it into many different meanings, some of which I don't even want to know.  So my spunky, bold daughter texted back,

"Who are you and why are you stalking me?  You better stop it or I'll call the police!"

Keep in mind that the innocent scout master thinks he is texting Pete.  Heaven only knows what he thought at the time.  Pete talked to Katie and asked her to please just tell or text the person that they have the wrong number the next time.  Apparently she forgot, which seems to be happening a lot these days.  So when a coworker texted this to Pete's old number the other day (when they were out of town at a business meeting),

"What time do you want to meet in the lobby for breakfast?"

Katie took it upon herself to shut that person up and stop him from harassing her. 

"Who are you and why are you texting me? Stop it!"

Again, the person who thought they were texting Pete probably presumed he had flipped out and joined the circus, or something like that.  But Pete didn't feel quite the same.  He had a little conversation with Katie.  Hopefully now she knows to come to us when she gets a weird text or message (just in case it is a creep) so that we can handle it.  We can only hope.

I am so grateful that Katie speaks her mind.  She does not care what others think and is not a people-pleaser like I am (which has turned out to be one of my biggest pitfalls in life).  She is smart and witty.  Most importantly, she can hold her own with her two brothers and a father like Pete.  Atta girl!

Big Tent Poetry Prompt: Enough

Enough is Enough
by Laurie Kolp

Enough is never enough
For this kid with too much stuff.
Like the boy Dudley Dursley
(The brat from Harry Potter)
His spoiled rotten antics
Make life hell for all who see
Piles of costly presents
Surrounding the Christmas tree
And still he cries,
“This ain’t enough!”
So his parents buy him more
Yet all are forgotten
By midnight New Year’s Eve.

Enough is never enough
For this spoiled rotten kid.
He bullies classmates each week,
Calls them names and beats them up
And when his teacher yells, “Enough!”
He turns the other cheek
Dusting her words off his shoulders
Tossing them into the sewer,
No respect has he
For any type of authority.

Enough is never enough
For this big, fat kid
Who eats too much.
He whines and creates a stew
Over healthy food on his plate,
Until his parents give in
And run to McDonald’s drive-through. 
The parents try and justify.
“Is this enough for my growing boy?”

Enough is never enough
For this kid who is now a man.
He squanders and splurges
To his heart’s content
And wonders why his life is so bland
Until one day he hits rock bottom,
Turns to God for help,
And this is what He says,
“I am the one who can fill you 
With peace and love enough--
Everything else material  
You will discover is just stuff.”

Acrostic: Scrooge

SCROOGE
by Laurie Kolp

Scrooge is what they called him,
Cranky weirdo beneath the light,
Resentment fueled his anger
Obsessive thoughts on Christmas night
Ominous signs, impending danger-- until
Grouchy miser gives in to whim
Entertaining Santa’s flight

Parody: Frosty the Snowman

Sally the Snowflake


Sally the snowflake was a frightful silly child
With a pouty mouth and a crooked nose
And two eyes that looked half wild.
Sally the snowflake is a scary thing, they say,
She was made with love but her family knows
How she acts on Christmas day.
There must have been a potion in that
Eggnog that she drank-
For when she took that first big swig
She began to walk the plank.
O, Sally the snowflake
Was as drunk as she could be,
And her siblings say she could cuss all day
Beneath the Christmas tree.
Crappity, crap, crap
Crappity, crap, crap
Look at Sally rave,
Crappity, crap, crap
Crappity, crap, crap
Over the gifts we gave!

laurie kolp

Open Link: With Real Toads