The trail you leave
weighs heavy
in my mind-
an anchor
falling
to the bottom
of the sea.
I reach for you
try to stop you
so close
and yet so far-
your touch
a mirage.
©laurie kolp
~~
Prompt inspiration:
IGWRT, A Word with Laurie- Effervescence
NaPoWriMo- Day 13
25 comments:
Trying to hold on to something which is slipping away! This poem could apply to so many situations, Laurie.
I like this a lot, Laurie!
I like that idea of the anchor dropping to the seabed - works so well in the context of your poem.
Oh, Laurie, this really works! Excellent poem. :)
Wow...that is the dirtiest looking tide water ever, lends alot to the heaviness of the words. Great writing.
sigh...I know this feeling. hugs to you.
travel well friend...
and i def understand you here...the slip off the end of the fingertip...teasing in its closeness...
aw. just out of reach, losing your grip. ooohh sad.
So close, and yet so far... says a lot and has an awful lot of feeling in this short piece Laurie.
Captured this perfectly - give yourself a raise.
I really like the direction you took the prompt. Great write.
Such a perfect metaphor!
Love this, Laurie. Love the juxtaposition between the foamy trail and the anchor. Excellent.
"Your touch a mirage" is so beautiful, Laurie.
K
Love the idea of the heaviness, the anchor dropping to the bottom of the sea......a beautiful write, kiddo.
I like the touch a mirage ~ Nice prompt Laurie ~
Nice, Laurie: "your touch a mirage."
Shawna
rosemarymint.wordpress.com
a lovely read, but sad
...my new prescription sunglasses slipped into a boat's bubbling wake very similar to this photo... we were going so fast... nothing I could do...
bu cry ;)
Great poem to go with the picture. Such a sad poem.
Very evocative and beautiful, Laurie! I'm sure we all know how this feels; you captured it so well with your imagery.
Laurie, hello. Great poem ... I like how compact it is.
My blog was featured on NaPoWriMo.net on Day 11. I've also been featuring other people's poem-a-day blogs on mine.
Could I get your permission to feature your blog? Nothing you have to do. I'll just post a very brief description and a link, a screencap which is also a link to the blog. Take a look at my blog to see the features so far (since Day 8). Just about to feature Anna Montgomery's "Chromapoesy" later on today.
Thanks! Could you get back to me asap? You can respond here or comment on my most recent blog post.
--Vince
Wonderful way to capture such a heartbreaking feeling.
These words bring my heart to the edge or great sadness. xo teri
Great one, Laurie. Maybe you could send to The Atomy (an online lit journal that Khara told me about). The theme for May is the ocean.
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