Reflections

I am not the same person I was a year ago. This time last year I was strumming through life, one day at a time, with my friend Mary by my side. She was over at my house during spring break with her kids (who had a different spring break then my kids had) and we were making plans. I had gotten some coupons for a neat amusement park and she was like- "Let's go!" Evidentally, her kids had been to this place before, but Mary and I had not. We wanted to go. And we were going to! Then two days later, well... you know the rest.
I am not in a very good place right now. My brother-in-law's mom passed away and I was back in the same funeral home yesterday that I went to a year ago when Mary died so unexpectedly. My brother-in-law's mom had Alzheimer's disease and was 77. But Mary- she was so young and had her whole life ahead of her. I can't believe that a year has passed and it seems like yesterday. I still have so many unanswered questions. Suicide is a horrible thing and it affects everyone. If only I could go back...