Your igneous heart destroyed me
pierced shards of metal right through me;
an irksome toy long forgotten
gathering dust in the garage,
as varmints erode love's mirage.
A wildfire ignited cotton;
high-pitched sirens bridle the course
all observe destruction in force.
Plowing fields, my mind's eye rotten.
@laurie kolp
Prompt inspiration: 3WW- erode, heart, observe; Poetic Bloomings- Poetry form~ Nove Otto
***********************
A Remix for Poetic Asides:
After years of pyromaniac destruction
infusion through my heart a wildfire path,
I found the courage to let you go
like a toy that won't stop sounding
deserted in the garage, a varmint
rotting my mind's eye of love.
@laurie kolp
Poetic Asides- a remix poem
14 comments:
Heartwrenching, this - the description of the narrator's heart as a toy, the dust gathering...it solidly drives the visual of this heartbreak home. The imagery carries us through several potent points as such...it reads almost like a primal scream for anyone that's experience such betrayal-loss I think. Splendid work.
Laurie,
A tinge of sadness seem apparent in this. Sometimes it portrays a yearning to be with someone dear but it didn't happen. Excellent verse!
Hank
I see betrayal of your emotions, your heart. You trusted someone and they betrayed you.
Very powerful, and yes, sad.
Powerful. Sad..
hitching a ride in rusted trails
I mlike the way you rhymed this!
A sad and broken heart - often is
the pain before joy. Well done.
The two pieces work extremely well placed together..I love the dark, heavy bitterness of the first..and the slightly lighter..conquering feel of the second..Jae
Heart wrenching poetry that still leaves one hopeful it could go on.
"A varmint."
Yup. I know exactly what you mean. Perfect word, image.
Both poems are excellent!
Laurie, this is powerful! My favorite line is: A wildfire ignited cotton; high-pitched sirens bridle the course all observe destruction in force.
This speaks of heart break but also that this heart wasn't all that easy to destroy anyway. Nonetheless, fiery multi-layered, multifaceted prose!
Wow Laurie ... these are tempestuous ... real ... and very powerful with the movement of emotion.
Impressed by my first reading I decided to read them both aloud and was stunned by their power. Well done.
"Igneous heart" -- yes, I've known a few of those...
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