Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Wednesday Offering

She tried to control her shaky
hand as the razor TA-touched
her leg
a prick, nick
too many and
once again
a stream of vodka unconsciousness.

@laurie kolp

Prompt inspiration: 3WW (control, flesh, razor)


Bethe77 said...

Yes! achol has a way of not allowing us to fuction.
Like your write today.

Chris said...

Vodka will make the razor appear double, it is a lethal combination I think :-)

Buddah Moskowitz said...

My, goodness don't drink and shave!

Lots of fun, thanks
Mosk (22 years sober, this Friday, btw)

Sheilagh Lee said...

yes vodka will do that.

Nimue said...

i wonder if it was intentional ..
good one ..

jaerose said...

Sad and cutting..and yet the imagery is perhaps familiar to many of us (unfortunately) The brevity makes your carefully chosen words even sharper..and more powerful..Jae

Daydreamertoo said...

Ouch, yes, I agree with Jae, your words are so powerful because they are so briefly stated. Ouch again.

Shauna said...

Very good, neat and authentic.

Angel said...

Nice piece about a not so nice subject.

oldegg said...

If you drink use an electric razor! If you drink vodka hairy is good!

Ron. said...

This reader, who once lived half a decade with a blackout tequila drinker, really appreciated this work. Great stuff.

Kay L. Davies said...

Good work with the three words, Laurie. Very realistic. K

The Unknowngnome said...

Compact and sharp wording. I like the simplicit imagery it paints.

It could be called a Bloody Laurie as a throwback to a Bloody Mary. That's the image you painted for me. :)

Mary Mansfield said...

Sharp little poem! And a nice reminder to keep sharp blades away from whatever hairy body part needs tending after a night of indulging.

Denise Moncrief said...

Very sharp, succinct use of the prompts. The cutting and the drinking hand in hand are a dangerous combination.

Marie said...

The spareness and choice of words
makes this poem almost seductive,
despite the sensitive nature of
this subject.