The black night veils a shadow blue
as darkness in my mind pulsates
boom, boom-- terse words echo in you.
The black night veils a shadow blue
and swings tight arms like fighting Sioux,
until love’s song my heart creates;
the Black Knight veils, a shadow blue
as darkness in my mind pulsates.
@laurie kolp
Prompt inspiration: Grace’s triolet challenge, Real Toads
13 comments:
The knight and night make a great duo in this fun triolet. I enjoyed it...
this is such a wonderfully circular piece. i really like the blue color tucked into the night.
Oh this is very good.. I like the subtle changes in the repeated line, and I can't remember the word Sioux being used in quite so innovative a way before. Lovely triolet.
Call me weird, but this somehow brings to my mind domestic violence--the dark side of "love."
An intriguing poem on several levels. The dark side of love Eva saw was concealed by the Knight I saw as goodness and honor in the first reading. Great triolet
Yes... there's a transformation in this.
Bravo, Laurie. Excellent triolet! I love the form.
Wow! Loves darkness...what a great title for a great poem!
Loved "the blues" in this, Laurie. I will never understand forms, but I'm sure you locked this is correctly...
"like fighting Sioux," really a stunning line. Thanks! Amy
http://sharplittlepencil.wordpress.com/2011/09/27/portrait-of-great-grandpa-and-mom/
A fascinating form Laurie! A triolet! May try it!
Hank
Very nicely done, finely crafted with lots of layers to ponder. I liked it a lot!
I love the flow, but also the imagines that arrive~ Stunning!
Your homonym keeps the original spirit of the form alive. Bravo.
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